Vreau sa fiu frumoasa, inteligenta si bogata

One evening, Nefes was with Tahir, telling him about her past. From the neighborhood, a sound started to stress Nefes more and more until she could not pay attention to Tahir or the surroundings.Someone was making some repairs to their house.

The rhythmic sound reminded Nefes of the metronome sound, the handcuffs and the torture room where Vedat used to punish her. She started to bite her lips, to tremble, to massage her wrists and in one moment she wasn’t with Tahir anymore, she was again in that room, trapped in her past.

Tahir saw her, he already knew the signs, she told him in details the stories about that room. His face changed, first he became pale, then his face darkened as he felt the revolt against the cruelties Nefes endured in the past and the helplessness in changing that past. He tried to distract her, calling her :

-NEFES! NEFES! NEFEEESSS!

He thought he was shouting, but in fact he was barely whispering. It was the zillion time he saw Nefes like that and he did not know what to do anymore. He remained silent, hoping for Nefes to get to her senses soon, but the engine of Tahir ship was trying to get his inner sea out of his chest. His heart was beating so loud he could feel  it in his ears.

Nefes was living again the nightmare of her life. On that bed, cuffed, with the perfusion and the diabolic sounds that tried to make her crazy. Vedat came in the room, like he always did in that memory, and he started talking. Nefes was forced to listen his words when something strange happened. Another sound was there, a new sound, a sound that wasn’t in that memory before. Vedat changed his attitude like he was hearing that sound too. He started to look alarmed and angry.

-What is that sound? WHAAT –IS-THAT-SOUND?????

Vedat looked around searching with his eyes the sound he could not control.

Meanwhile, the sound became stronger than any sound in that room, stronger than Vedat’s voice. The handcuffs started to vibrate and they broke and fell. Vedat disappeared and the room disappeared too. Nefes got up and started to go to that sound direction

She was again with Tahir now, but that sound was still the loudest. Now she understood where the sound was coming from. It was the sound of Tahir’s heartbeat. The sound almost blinded her, she sees Tahir, but she can’t see him clearly. The sound was calling for her, was asking for her and she wanted to reach the source.

He opened the zipper of Tahir’s jacket thus waking Tahir from his thoughts. He looked at her in shock, but before he could say something, she started opening his shirt’s buttons until his chest remained free. She put her head on his chest and listened to his heart beat with the most pure and reverence gesture.

After a while, her voice broke the silence and she said:

-Taa-hiir, you know?  Every beat of your heart beats that monster away from my mind, from my memories!

He smiled, bent a little and kissed her on her head. He raised his head looking at the sky, trying to stop the tears filling his eyes.

Tahir was happy to be Nefes cure, but he realized in that moment, as Nefes’s hair was covering his chest : that woman will never be his. His hopes were over. His stubbornness was over. His resistance was over. He finally accepted the truth people were telling him but he did not want to accept before. Since he met Nefes he felt like he jumped from that rock and never got to the sea, but he always hoped he will. Now, he understood that the fall will never end and he bent his head as he was accepting the reality like being Allah’s will.

Nefes was ok now and as she realized she was glued to Tahir’s chest she started to blush. She looked up to Tahir like a child asking for forgiveness but Tahir’s eyes were nor upset, nor playful or mocking, as she expected him to be in such situation. As he was bending his head towards her, his face was more beautiful than ever.  She saw endless love and freedom in his eyes, while he was seeing the eternal falling he remained trapped into, willingly. Seeing him like that, Nefes forgot who was she. She forgot where she was coming from, were was she going to, she forgot everything. There was nothing else except for Tahir in this world. She raised her head slowly, and then, the most unexpected thing happened: Tahir’s endless fall was  now ended as her lips met his lips. They remained like that for a few seconds, or maybe minutes, or centuries… who knows? The Time itself was not there. There was nothing there, except for  Nefes and Tahir kissing like their kiss was the first and the last in this world…..(to be continued)